Synopsis: The Big Apple’s in big trouble, as indestructible psycho-fiend Jason Voorhees hits the road to New York City – and paints the town “red.”

After a shocking return from beyond the grave, the diabolical Jason ships out aboard a teen filled “love boat” bound for New York, which he soon transforms into the ultimate voyage of the damned. Then one of his terrified victims escapes into the nightmarish maze of Manhattan’s subways and sewers, only to confront Jason one final time.
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Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Takes Manhattan 3.0

Or, as they SHOULD have called it: ‘Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Goes on a Cruise’. Personally, I think calling it ‘Friday the 13th Part VIII: Jason Goes to the Prom’ would have been funnier, but, sadly, it’s not as accurate.

…mind you, come to think of it, it’s about AS accurate as saying that he ‘Takes Manhattan’. After all, the first hour is spent on a cruise ship – on their WAY TO Manhattan. No joke! The film only barely takes place in NYC oO

The large part of the movie is spent on this big-@$$ed multi-deck cruise ship, which is supposed to have been rented for a graduation party. At first we’re given the impression the whole school is there, because there’s a reference to seniors, …etc. But, by midway,, we discover that there’s only about a dozen kids. What?

Meanwhile, Jason is lurking about on this ship, wandering around without a care. No one sees him, no one takes notice or bumps into him. And while his victims are screaming bloody murder, no one hears anything. In the middle of nowhere, on a pretty much empty cruise ship, no one can hear a sound. What?

And, to make matters worse, Jason “teleports” faster than ever! The lambs run 200 metres away from him, only to bump right back into him – even though he always walks at the speed of John Candy after a large burrito dinner. I mean, at one point, a kid climbs up the mast and, suddenly, Jason is right behind him. What?

Sigh… now I wish I had given Part VII a 2.5. It’s definitely a worse film than this is. And yet Part VIII doesn’t deserve anything more than a 3.0.

To think that, from what I remember, Part IX is even worse. Hard to fathom oO

Thankfully, I don’t have it, don’t intend to seek it out, and can safely say that my flirtation with the Voorhees and Crystal Lake is at its end.

Almost.

More on that tomorrow 😉