Halloween H20: 20 Years Later

Synopsis: This smart and suspenseful thriller scares up a bone-chilling good time with original scream queen Jamie Lee Curtis (You Again) and a hot cast of hip young stars!

Now the headmistress of a private school, Laurie Strode (Curtis) is still struggling with the horrifying, 20-year-old memories of the maniacal killer Michael Myers…when he suddenly reappears with a vengeance. Laurie’s rebellious son (Josh Hartnett, 30 Days of Night), his girlfriend (Michelle Williams, Shutter Island ), and the school security guard (LL Cool J, TV’s NCIS: Los Angeles) will become Michael’s newest victims unless Laurie can conquer her greatest fears and put evil in its place once and for all. The time has come again for you to experience the frightening fun of Halloween – the motion picture series that totally redefined terror.

***********************************************************************

Halloween H20: 20 Years Later 5.5

20 years after the events of the first two films, Laurie Strode is now a slightly alcoholic headmistress in a posh, but totally secluded school. She’s been in an abusive relationship and has a son to show for it. Unfortunately, no form of therapy has helped her; she’s been afraid of the boogeyman for all of two decades. Now, out of the blue, Michael Myers returns.

‘Halloween H20’ essentially ignores everything that’s happened after ‘Halloween’ and ‘Halloween II’; this is a direct sequel to them and could theoretically be called ‘Halloween III” (if not for the fact that they have something like four dozen sequels since winking0002 Free Emoticons   Winking). Nice way to mess with continuity and piss off fans of the series, huh? tongue0024 Free Emoticons   Sticking Out Tongue

But the film was put together by the same people involved with the ‘Scream’ franchise and it shows: the style is similar, visually and storytelling-wise, and you can tell that they were trying to cash in on the success of ‘Scream’ and ‘I Know What You Did Last Summer’. Sadly, the revamping of the series’ style doesn’t work here. mad0071 Free Emoticons   Anger

I have to blame it on two things: the director and the screenplay. The director is the man behind ‘Friday the 13th 2 + 3’. Not a good start – it’s a popular series, but it’s weak as all get-out. As for the screenplay, the producers basically got some no-names to do the writing; the dialogue was terrible. So between Miner and no-names, the tone of the film was really off. mad0071 Free Emoticons   Anger

I mean, the basic idea is good, but it’s delivered in such a monotonous way; you don’t care about the characters and there are nothing but fake scares – which get tiresome and aren’t really scary anyway. In fact, there’s no real tension at all until about an hour into it, when Josh Hartnett and Michelle Williams are trapped between locked gates and doors and Michael is trying to get to them.

B-t-w, now I remember why I hated Josh Hartnett so much (until seeing ’30 Days of Night’, that is). He’s so irritating here, and his character looks like a total spazz. It’s too bad, ’cause I should have enjoyed the dynamic between him and his mom, Laurie Strode. I should have sympathized with both of them, but didn’t at all. sad0133 Free Sad Emoticons

Speaking of which, they got Janet Leigh to play a small role opposite her real-life daughter, Jamie Lee Curtis. That was cool, even if the scenes were lifeless. Actually, none of the characters were connectors; we didn’t care about any of them. And Laurie Strode, who should be the core, only barely. What a missed opportunity. sad0038 Free Sad Emoticons

Even the things you should be able to count on were neutered:

The iconic and genuinely spooky ‘Halloween’ music was barely used; the original themes hardly ever recurred and, instead, we got a more orchestral or ambient score – neither style capable of replacing the simplistic, eery original score. mad0071 Free Emoticons   Anger Honestly, the music by John Ottman and Marco Beltrami was okay. It just wasn’t suitable for ‘Halloween’.

Michael Myers should be scary; he should creep about and feel like he’s omnipresent. The director inserted him here and there, but he didn’t make his scenes scary at all. mad0071 Free Emoticons   Anger And what’s with the mask? It is so $#!tty-looking. It gave me the willies not because it was scary, but because it made me think of someone who’s had way too much plastic surgery, like Michael Jackson or Joan Rivers. I think the painted-on eyebrows is what really sealed the deal. Yes, painted-on eyebrows. mad0137 Free Emoticons   Anger

There were only three highlights in the whole 80 minutes (thank goodness for the short run time!):

-Laurie Strode eventually steels herself and goes after Michael in the same kick @$$ way that Ripley goes after the alien. Awesome! I love super strong female characters like that. love0010 Free Emoticons   Love

-The musical nod to ‘Psycho’ when Janet Leigh does her final scene was a nice touch. happy0027 Free Emoticons   Happy And then her character heads off towards an old car that bears a ressemblance to the one she drove in the Hitchcock classic.

-The Halloween theme punched through the speakers with gusto when Laurie went calling out after Michael. happy0021 Free Emoticons   Happy This punctuated the scene tremendously and was almost goose-bump inducing. Almost.

I had seen ‘H20’ ten years ago, after its release on DVD and was totally underwhelmed by it, despite being a fan of both the ‘Halloween’ and ‘Scream’ franchises. I never saw it again. The only reason I picked it up again was to complete the collection. And even then I waited years until I could get it for a couple of bucks.

Frankly, I’m still underwhelmed. It’s not a stupid film like some of the other ‘Halloween’ sequels (although it has its moments, trust me rolleye0015 Free Emoticons   Rolling Eyes), but it’s so emotionally dead that it’s very hard to be involved in any of it.

I can’t imagine watching this again, unless it’s with someone who insists on it. Frankly, I could reduce this to an 80-second montage and it would be enough. indifferent0004 Free Emoticons   Indifferent

What do you think?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s